When Real Estate Agents Say This, It Really Means That

Real estate humor? We swear, it’s not an oxymoron. How far are you pushing the envelope in your efforts to sell a home? Lighten up and laugh at yourself.

What are you really saying when you’re describing listings?

  • A charming home…
    Not old enough to be historic, but too old to be considered new… This home is experiencing a mid-life crisis.
  • Original condition…
    Bring your duct tape and WD40, if this home was a car, it’d be wearing a “HONK IF PARTS FALL OFF” bumper sticker.
  • A turn of the century, historic home…
    Probable electrical, plumbing, lead paint, and asbestos issues, with the added bonus of no storage space.
  • This house is low maintenance…
    This house hasn’t been maintained in 25 years.
  • Architect ready…
    You’d better be married to one, this total gut job is going to cost you some serious green.
  • This home is cozy…
    You’ll outgrow this house before you get the moving van unloaded.
  • Conveniently located…
    Let your imagination run wild… Could be located right next to anything: the expressway, airport, train depot, industrial area, or wildlife refuge, even the local Walmart.
  • Recently updated home…
    The seller bought this home as a foreclosure – and repainted the interior.
  • Pool home…
    Kiss your free time good-bye and bring your checkbook for the added insurance, repair, pool care, chemicals, safety equipment…
  • Rustic…
    Plumbing consists of an outhouse or composting toilet.
  • Finishing touches needed…
    We hope you’re good with drywall, trim, paint, flooring…
  • A once in a lifetime opportunity…
    You might want to avoid this phrase unless you want to be the butt of future real estate humor jokes. The only thing that’s once in a lifetime is death.

Running out of real estate humor thanks to the challenges in today’s market? We can help. Effective marketing and time savings are only a click away. Check out Listings Unlimited today.

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JamesMilner
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hey great page, this is good info! if Your curious about the Marijuana industry in REAL Estate make sure you check this video out! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-GM5sKlEeew

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